Five days from now, on Tuesday March 13th, I'll be celebrating the one year anniversary of my heart surgery. A lot of things have changed since then. I was forced to give up smoking, drinking, fried chicken, coffee with caffeine in it, collard greens, broccoli, salt, and if I hadn't given up bad women a couple of years ago I'd probably had to have given them up too. Writing this list I thought about an old friend of mine, Wayne Storey. Wayne always talked about his favorite hobbies were drinking beer, shooting pool, and chasing women. The doctor told Wayne he was going to have to slow down. He decided he was gonna give up shooting pool. He was one of the best friends I ever had. I miss him.
I've changed a lot in the past year. Going through something like that seems to change most people that I've talked to. For several years, I have been concerned about leaving a legacy. Now I could really care less. Sure I hope I leave something behind that maybe inspires someone and that maybe some of my good deeds will continue to help others in some way. I just don't really think of it much anymore. I just want to do whatever is fun. I try to spend a couple hours a day doing something in SamG Land. I have cut way back on making art that is for sale. It isn't much fun anymore. Making stuff for SamG Land, that I will get to enjoy is what is fun for me right now.
I still have a love/hate relationship with these mountains. If I had it all to do over again, I'd probably never done it. Other than meeting a handful of people that will be life long friends, not much good has come of it. That's why I spend so much time making my own world to enjoy. My attitude has become, "I'm going to build it, and I don't give a damn whether they come or not." Lorri has been very good to me. She's done more for me than I honestly deserve. I'm thankful for that. Maybe I should move to Ohio. Most of the visitors I get here are from Ohio. I used to ship a lot of art to Ohio too. I don't want to go to Ohio, it's too cold.
The past is the past though, and the present is where your ass is. The incident last year with my heart surgery makes me think about "What If I didn't make it?" I've pretty much decided that I want to be cremated and flushed down the toilet at South of the Border. I decided on the whole "flushing" thing a while back... so people can have the opportunity to keep shitting on me, if they choose. The location recently changed though. The original location was to be Flying J Truck Stop in Jackson, Ga. At least South of the Border is the most magical place on Earth that is basically a truck stop. Lorri has said she won't flush me, so somebody else has to do that part.
I also decided that I want SamG Land torn down. I am still in the beginning stages of it, considering I've only been working on it a little over a year. Most of that year, I was recovering from open heart surgery. But whatever it becomes, I want it gone. I enjoy traveling to art environments. Pasaquan is my favorite place ever. It seems like most art environments go into a state of disrepair after the artist is gone. The person that everyone considered crazy who spent his life building his vision becomes the town hero. I really don't want to leave a burden for anyone to keep up. The biggest thing though, I really don't want to leave anything here for the local people to claim. I always said that I am the art, the paintings and stuff I made were just souvenirs. Love me while I'm here!!!
I've always done things the hard way. I have a hard time trusting people. I see deeper into people than most, and feel like I know someone's intent. I can be hard to get along with too from a business standpoint. I've been approached several times over the years by agents wanting to sign me up and promote me. I always tell them to figure out how to make some money and come back and we'll figure out how to split it. I hadn't heard back from one of them yet. I had one lady once wanting to promote me, she said that she could have me where I was so famous that I would be showing my art in London and Italy. I told her that I was looking for somebody that would make me famous enough that them sumbitches would come over here. I also refuse to deal with galleries or dealers, unless they buy my art outright. I had several galleries early on screw me over. I also have a hard time with people trying to tell me what I can't do.
At this point in life, I am not going to do very many shows. I have no real desire to do much of anything local, other than the Fandangos at SamG Land. Healthwise, I don't trust myself to try to do anything by myself. I have good days and bad days and still need a lot of help some of the time. I've been narrowing down my show schedule the couple of years and calling them "Rare Public Appearances." Those are going to become even more rare.
As I think back to the events of March 13, 2017 I'm still humbled, and thankful for all the love and prayers and kind thoughts that so many poured out upon me. I cry when I think about it. I am now as I write about it. Looking toward the coming anniversary, my mind has been a whirlwind of random thoughts. Still searching for my purpose in this world..... I figure God let me live.... He will show me why......
Love to each and every one of you..... SamG
